That ending theme though. It's really getting to me. I mean, I haven't heard it in roughly seven months and I'm feeling really weird about it. I feel like I should be texting Vishal 24/7 and blogging about my broken heart. I feel like I should being doing French homework while waiting for Kellan to get on Facebook. I feel like I should be wearing flannel. I feel like there should be snow on the ground.
But none of those things are happening right now. I mean, I don't think Vishal would be particularly opposed to me texting him 24/7, but we just aren't like that anymore. I don't have a broken heart, so I can't blog about it. I will never have French homework ever again, and if I want to talk to Kellan I can just text him. Flannel weather is coming, but it's not here yet, and I really am not ready for snow.
I feel like a completely different person.
I still love Grey's Anatomy. But now I also like Glee. And Xena. And Supernatural (I admit it). It's weird how a sound can bring you back in time. I remember exactly how I felt. It's like muscle memory. However, I can't feel that way anymore. Meredith and Christina still manage to verbalize things that I am thinking, but I don't think it's in the same way. I happy now. I wasn't then. Not really. Yeah, things could be better. Yeah, I still have shit I have to take care of--but it will take care of itself eventually. I just have to let it. Stop meddling, you know?
As long as I keep living life like this, things will work out.
See, I am already looking back and seeing how foolish I was. Progress.