I'm Sorry I Can't Manage to Blog Regularly

Really, I am.

School is good. I do nothing all day "....and I don't give a SHIT!" Haha. It's nice, I mean after having years upon years of nose to the grindstone workload, it's nice to be able to breathe.

My birthday is coming up. It's my eighteenth birthday. That makes me an adult, right? I'm considered an adult by the law. I can vote. I can fill out a credit application. I can sign up to be considered to be a tester for the new game Star Wars: The Old Republic. Yes, that definitely makes me an adult.

I'm listening to my Yearbook Adviser teach her one of her LA III classes. I should just admit it to myself: I'm going to be an English teacher at some point in my life. Ah, jeez.

College.....what a horrible decision for a minor to make. Good thing I'll be an adult in a few weeks, a wave of true enlightenment will then envelop me and all will become clear. Wait.....isn't that nirvana?

As I Wait For Eggs To Boil

I dunno why, but I really have a craving for egg salad.

Anyway, I got really close to the conclusion of my quest to defeat Meatloaf. But then I bought Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children--Complete and now I am finding it hard to resume my quest. I mean, I already know how it ends, Aeris already died, I found out why Cloud is so freaking moody. So really, is there any need to continue?
I am such a slacker.

Yearbook camp was great. Me, Madz and Becca came up with a killer theme: "NOW is the Time".

I started going to this bible study group out of the Callahan church (Eagle Point). All seems well right now, but I've only been there two times. I wonder when I will really start to cause problems.

I currently hold all the top records on Wii Fit. Yes, and I am a crippled.

Pit camp starts Monday, and (hopefully) so will the filming of my new documentary. God willing.

Psst Don't tell anybody, but I'm kinda excited to head back to school.

-----

You came, you left.
And all I had was a glimpse.
Partly your fault, partly chance.
But mostly me and my shaky hands,
Unable to grasp a telephone.
But at least I know now
That I am just as alive to you
As you are to me.
If only I could now tell the truth.

Fine--You Got Me

I haven't resumed my battle with Meatloaf. It's irritating. But I am attending Yearbook Camp which is somewhat entertaining. We are getting a lot accomplished.

-----

lol God.
Freaking funny.
Fine.

As Meatloaf Massacres the Land...

So, my break from fighting Sephiroth is turning out to be a lot longer than preferred. I am in Alabama, which means no FFVII. That also equals a somewhat miffed Natalie. But it's alright, I'm dealing. I have a FFVII desktop background now to help me cope. Christopher and I are now referring to Sephiroth as 'Meatloaf'. (It was a long process to come to that--first it was Sephirloaf, then Supperloaf, then Meatloaf.) But anyway, things are good-ish.

-----

Last night, instead of sleeping,
I thought.
And thought.
And thought.
I decided to plead a little.
Then a lot.
I am broken and you are the missing piece.
I just want that back.
I figure it's not that much to ask.
Especially since I'm like Bella in New Moon.
Except Jacob just doesn't exist.
That's right, I've got a gaping hole.
....
Okay, maybe not to that severity.
But the idea is conveyed, is it not?
I've realized all too late my mistake.
I simply ask to correct it.
I mean, you couldn't come in my life just to leave me in such a way.
You mean too much for that.
And I think the Powers That Be realize that.
Hopefully, my request will be granted.
After all, I've promised anything and everything.

-----

Alabama is great for the first time in a long time.
But I still want to fight Meatloaf.
:)

This Is Me Taking A Break From Fighting Sephiroth

So for the majority of the day, I played Final Fantasy VII. It's really an amazing game. I love it. I can easily see why it's considered to be the greatest game of all time amongst many gamers. Plus, I'm really starting to understand Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children alot better.
I really wish that life was like that in the Final Fantasy Universe. That is to say, I wish people dressed in awesome battle gear specific to there class, carried around awesome weapons, and could cast magic as long as you had enough MP. I wish that instead of sending an army to defend us from danger, we could just find a local, conflicted but strong young person to save the world. They would be stronger than the army anyway. Once that person was identified, though out there journey, he or she would assemble a multifaceted party--each member would be equally as strong, but in a different area. Periodically, the party would run into monsters and would easily defeat each and every one, gaining experience along the way. And if by a small chance one member of the party was defeated, someone would just purchase a bit of Phoenix Down to revive the fallen comrade. I mean, seriously, wouldn't you like to a part of something like that?
Unfortunately, we do not life like that though. And that kinda sucks.

-----

Last night I dreamed of you again.
You visited me.
It was like old times.
We were having fun.
You were complaining about how you hate where you live and wish things could be different.
Still, you had to leave.
That would have been fine, except I woke up just as you were leaving.
Consequently, I was not able to say goodbye.
How horribly ironic.
Will you ever leave me?
Will life ever stop shoving my greatest regret in my face?
I fear not.

No One Mourns The Wicked

I love the Wicked soundtrack.
I fear that my life will end up being defined by the role of the Wicked Witch of the West.
I'm starting to adore anything green.

The thing about volunteer work is that you have to volunteer to do it.
Otherwise you die.
On the same coin, you have to be able to end the volunteering when you are maxxed out.
It's not volunteering if you are trapped.
For example:
Yesterday, my mom came home at two in the morning.
She said, "I don't like having a job."
I replied, "A job would have let you off hours ago."

I have two goals the summer.
1. Beat three videogames (Titles already determined.)
2. To play with my band.
I haven't started on either and my summer is moving far to quickly.

Remember the Twilight movie?
Remember the disappointment?
Kristen Stewart's face was only capable of producing seizures.
Instead of sparkling, Edward just became pixlated.
Remember?
Of course, I blamed the actors and special effects people at first. However, upon examining Kristen Stewart's other films, I have come to a new conclusion.
Twilight's failure was the director's fault.
In the movie representation of Speak (which was fantastic), Kristen Stewart was amazing. I didn't see a single seizure grace her face. Then I remembered that in her other films (I've seen every movie she has been except one), she didn't have facial seizures either. Now this didn't make any sense! Why did she suck all of a sudden? Obviously, the direction was at fault.
This infuriated me.
Considering that I am planning to go to school to become a director, it doesn't make any sense to me that someone who has been educated to direct a film would fail at it. Especially a film with the resources that Twilight had. An audience rarely thinks of the director when the see a film. If they think of anything other than the plot, it's usually a special effect or an actor's performance. Usually, if an actor sucks, it's obviously the actor's fault. If the movie sucks--all the actors suck, the special effects are bad, the editing is bad--one usually comes to the conclusion that the movie had a budget issue. This was not the case with Twilight. Most of the actors were pretty good--even Kristen Stewart had some good moments--about half of the special effects were good, the editing was alright, and everyone knows the budget wasn't really an issue. So why did the movie suck? Really, the only conclusion left to draw is that the director simply failed.
I did some research and the director of Twilight, Catherine Hardwicke, experience in the movie business has mostly been as a production designer and she had only directed three other films (two were absolute flops) before directing Twilight. Seriously, who hired this person?
Fortunately, they have hired a different director,Chris Weitz, for New Moon. He has directed four films before directing New Moon (three of which were box office hits), produced ten films and several TV series, and written for three films and two TV series. This is a much more quailified individual. So if this movie sucks chances is are it won't be his fault, but I'm gonna keep my fingers crossed anyway.

So.
I started reading My Sister's Keeper.
It's really good.
I am really excited and nervous to see the film.
If it's good, it will be amazing.
If it's not, I will cry and curse the film industry.

This was really long.
My mom's gripping at me to get off.
Sorry.

She Was Never Perfect, But Oh My Friend Neither Were You

I have one more day.
Technically, it's a half day, but I'm gonna be there at least until three.
So one more day.
But it's a horrible day.
I still really don't know my fate when it comes to math.
I may not get the guitar.
....
Screw that, I am getting that guitar regardless of what happens.

I can't wait until next year, but I want this summer to last long.
I don't want to ever feel like I feel right now again.
Completely and totally exhausted.
I need to rest.
I need a new start.

Thank God it happens in 24 hours.